January 2010
77 posts
Catalyst
I’m tired of being the catalyst for people. I just want a person I can keep. Someone who doesn’t leave me or push me away or “realize their potential and go after it.” It’d be cool to not be left alone at the end of the day.
I love helping people, and so if I can help them realize something important about their life, then that’s wonderful. Or if I help them...
I Woke Up to the Sound of Birds
And my heart was light and happy. This will be a good day. This has been a rejuvenating weekend; I will end it on a good note.
Sometimes you just have to convince yourself of things like that.
I'm Searching
I’m sitting in a bed that’s not even mine, living, for a day, a life that’s not even mine. And I’m happy with it. Shit. That scares me. I want my life to be this peaceful. This refreshing. Instead of what it is.
No. No I don’t. I like my life, but I need more. I need more out of it. The people are wonderful, but I grow tired.
I’d like my life to start now....
I Almost Strangled Myself in my Sleep
Sometimes you sleep in your clothes and wake up with this awful feeling in the pit of your stomach. You wish you could just crawl out of the room and into your bed and magically be in you pajamas like nothing ever happened. And waking up fully dressed is a bit disorienting.
I used to think that if I slept in the clothes I wanted to wear the next day, I would save so much time. Theoretically, all...
Sinking
Drowning is the best option here I’d rather sink than soar without you..
The water’s creeping up on me I have nothing left to cling to
When you reach down in rescue And whisper “Hey, I love you…”
“Well, I’ll see you in a month…”
– :D
It's Nice to be Proven Right
Even when you wanted to be so wrong about it.
Masochistic - noun: the act of turning one's...
I have masochistic tendencies. Only when things are shit. Thankfully, that’s not right now. But fuck, it’ll be terrible next time.
Nevermind that my Inner World was Shit
I bit my lip
so hard it bled
but that didn’t even work
because the words still were said
and that’s not the problem
because they needed to get out
but I didn’t feel bad
and that scared me
because I used to feel bad
I used to feel like I had to be careful
I tried to keep things in balance
in my outside world
nevermind that my inner world was shit
because no one saw...
“When I was a girl, my life was music that was always getting louder.
Everything...”
– Jonathan Safran Foer
Previous Post
The point of that was supposed to be that it’s sad when you see people you used to be so close to and you instead have one of the most awkward encounters ever.
But I like the point I made.
Today I saw her. And I felt the sadness. The sadness from last year that haunted her for too long. The sadness that he seemed to remove. It was back. It hung around her like a familiar scarf. She was waiting for him so she could eat dinner with him and get to work at six. It was 5:54. She was going to be late. That realization made her appear even sadder and she retreated farther into her...
I don't have a title for this one.
The asking of a simple question by an unknowing friend:
“Who was your best kiss?”
In an attempt to maintain the level of honesty I’ve had with this friend, I searched the corridors of my mind. I started with the most recent and quickly dismissed them as mediocre. I started at the beginning and realized they were even worse. Then I finally reached it. Him. He was my best kiss.
...
In a mix of sheer exhaustion, anti-social tendency, and compassion I’m up thinking. I do some of my best thinking when my mind seems too weary to form a full sentence. I do my best observing in those moments. Reflecting. Ascribing. Detailing. Remembering.
But I always come back to you…
“It’s one hundred and nine degrees in this crowded room
No room to breathe...”
– A Fine Frenzy
4 tags
Go on and need me...
I often worry that I fluctuate between extremes too often. Extremely happy. Extremely sad. Extremely peaceful. Extremely agitated. I’m really focusing on two main issues that seem to be occurring all too often in my life. I’m extremely needy and extremely independent. I’m extremely helpful and extremely apathetic.
The neediness first, please. I need people. Desperately. I love...
I start my internship tomorrow!
Ah! So excited. :)
There is so much grace in saying: 'God, whether I...
followandreblog:
-Isabel Garcia
(via themorninglight)
“I have been listening to your old Zune and I have decided not to get rid of...”
– My Padre
2 tags
"But my mind is open..."
I was just called closed minded by someone. So now I sit, brokenhearted. I know that this person doesn’t know. Didn’t know me. Won’t know. But the words of a stranger still sting.
Especially those words. Because I try so hard to be open-minded. It’s one of the most important things to me. I know what’s it like to talk to those people whose mind is already made up...
I'm not fun to be around today. I'm lazy and...
(via hrtwacp)
Hey. I still love you. No matter what.
I’d like nothing more than to sit down with you and talk. But I don’t think there are enough words.
Me me me me me.
When this ends, what will I do? When this ends, who will I be?
It’s so strange to think about choosing who I want to be. I’m just me. Small. Insignificant. Hopeful. Who do I want to be? Hmm. I want to be a more refine version of this girl I currently am. More poise. More experience. More compassion. More faith. So I guess that’s who I want to be. I think I’m on the right...
If I were a month, I would be September. If I were a day of the week, I would be a Friday. If I were a time of the day, I would be dusk. If I were a planet, I would be Neptune. If I were a sea animal, I would be a dolphin. If I were a direction, I would be west. If I were a liquid, I would be tea. If I were a tree, I would be a birch. If I were a flower, I would be a dahlia. If I were a color, I...
Since you.
I drop my bags on your welcome mat. Embracing me carefully, you tell me about that day.
The day we were happy because we were so young and everything was right because we were higher than the sun.
Words keep spilling like the wine we drank as you keep talking about the love we’d make.
The warm months passed, leaves fell around us as we shared and said the things we must.
After all the...
1 tag
Lady Gaga →
3 tags
“…You are true happiness”
– A friend of mine
“Happy girls are the prettiest.”
– Audrey Hepburn
